FOR WHAT I LIVE, FROM WHAT I DIE
I: Prologue (Uncovered) |
Small creature are you,
Small creature you
How quickly you are uncovered,
Naked and cold,
Mumbling and crying,
everything's been discovered.
Many secrets have you,
Many secrets you
But it's only a matter of time.
Did you finally decide,
There's nowhere to
And really no reason why.
Strong is your body, strong are your
Strong as your bloody lie, is
II: The Forest |
The Forest. That which is me. My Soul, my
Mind. The Forest. Inside myself many different factions fight for
control of my life. I make the final judgment yet all must have
their say. Within the darkened trunks of the Forest, there are
those who would like to see me try and rule Her. On the other side
of the river live those who want Her to be happy and live Her own
life without influence from me--I should have no control over Her
actions. In the woods beyond the camp live the brave few who
believe that maybe, just maybe, the Two are right for each other.
That She should go to Him and be happy. They don't come around
often. And then their are those who live with me. Those who think
we should share all, happiness and
III: The Hunt |
In our search for what is right we hunt.
We search out that what we hope to find. Some of us return with
the kill; some without. Sometimes when we hunt, we get lost in the
woods. The deep, dark, lush forest plays host to a myriad of
creatures: some good, some bad. Ahh, the hunt! The exasperating
thrill of the chase, and the ecstasy of a kill. For what we live,
from what we die. Some say the hunt isn't worth it. Some say that
safer is better. I say how can one live safe at home, while your
freedom hides in the forest? Every hunt we die a little more. And
yet with every hunt we grow stronger. The tiger and the lion.
Chasing, fighting, killing, losing,
IV: Betrayal |
For Us the hunt had gone bad. On a deep
trek into the canopy, She and I came across another hunter: Him.
She knew. She wanted to know. I knew not. I wanted not to know.
Straightaway I knew there was evil within His soul. To this day my
thoughts of Him drift towards the ancient evils. I wanted to kill
Him; not allow Him to live. She said She knew, but to let him
live. Funny how live is evil, and evil is live. Life is just that
V: Questions |
How come trust is love yet love may not
be trust. Can one be without the other? Is there a hunt without a
prey, or prey without a hunter? Love, like evil and live, is
evol...evolve. With love we evolve. Without, Darwin is the jester.
Her and I had the chance to EVOLve. We had the greatest hunt of
them all, until She bit the apple...until she betrayed me.
That damn apple. Wasn't the fruit of my
orchard enough for Her? Was He truly sweeter than I? It was just a
bite they'd say. One little bite is surely not enough for your
feeling this way. She meant nothing by it. They were friends. Was
it not okay?
It's not their apple rotting on the
sittingcloth. Not their heart lying broken in the middle of the
Lake of Fire. Not their rage growing and feeding upon itself
inside their temple. The dogs have truly been let loose and for
the first time their baying races across the moors to meet my ears
That bittersweet howling resonates in my
skull. How could She? What had I done for Her to do this? These
thoughts flew through my head. As did questions as to what I
should do, believe, think, want. Has the box been opened? Has
Pandora fallen once again? Has He feasted in Her wicked garden. As
the dogs begin to smell Her, will She smell
VI: The Redemption |
Does the dancing girl want another turn?
With tear in eye and tear in heart she turns to Her warrior once
"Forgive me, for my heart is crushed by
remorse!" She cried. My mind turned and formed various answers to
the question of redemption.
Those from the woods came and added their
enlightenment to the pot. "Let Him have Her. Your hunt lies
elsewhere beyond the jaded frontiers of this heart which so
wickedly turned against you!"
Those from my village stood up to let
their voices be heard through the din. "Share with Her and She
shall be happy. Hoard and She shall stray. Share and She shall
The Other-siders also were in attendance.
"Together shall there be no guarantee of holy and gracious love.
From the heart comes the love of Understanding, the love of
Forgiveness and the love that you feel for Her. Go to Her and She
shall meet you there, arms outstretched and waiting to greet Her
lost son once
VII: Epilogue |
So the story ended. We tried once again
to forget the serpent who had invaded the tranquility of our house
and to live once again for the hunt. But as always, with live
The serpent visited again. My will was
crushed. The Other-siders won against the mighty fights of the
mine; to let Her once again journey with The-One-Who-Is-Not-Right.
Again the trust was broken, our seal shattered into tiny fragments
strewn across the hard marble floor.
The growing crimson pool of red, stark
against the cool blue tile of Love that we had laid, once again
grew, drinking straight from my Heart's lifeblood to feed it's own
sorrow. Within this sea of sorrow have I drowned.
Truly the dogs have come and taken Her
away. As I laid afflicted in my quarters, she frolicked across the
kingdom with the Him. I raise my voice in mourning and merge it
with that morning's second sorrowing of the dogs as they creep
across the Plains of the
VIII: The State of Love and Trust |
Yet we evolved in love. As evil out of
live, so evolve out of love. And now we live for love beneath the
Once. We play in the sands of China and the pools of Aladdin. So
is He once gone, so is He once again gone. Sure am I of his
return, yet sure also am I, of Our love...and Our
For the Pumpkin, the Dog, and the Bears...